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Category: YoMomma
Message: Yo mamma so stupid, it took her two hours to watch 60 minutes
Submitted By: Robert

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Life isn't about the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away. Like choking.
  • Currently 3.78/5
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3.8/5 (1149 votes)

Submitted by: MICHAE2414
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch some Marijuana. Jack got high and dropped his fly and said do you wanna? Jill said yes and dropped her dress and then they had some fun. Silly Jill forgot her pill and then they had a son.
  • Currently 3.82/5
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3.8/5 (3738 votes)

Submitted by: kaylamarie23
Shhhhh! I'm hiding from %n...Damn! How did you find me??
  • Currently 2.94/5
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2.9/5 (125 votes)

Submitted by: phantomz45
When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crap out of them.
  • Currently 3.99/5
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4.0/5 (4801 votes)

Submitted by: fetterattereich
I'm riding the ponies outside WalMart. Be back when I run out of quarters.
  • Currently 3.83/5
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3.8/5 (2697 votes)

Submitted by: VMan25bv
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, youre a mile away and you have their shoes. See ya when i get back......
  • Currently 3.66/5
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3.7/5 (767 votes)

Submitted by: 
You don't have to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the slowest guy running from the bear.
  • Currently 3.83/5
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3.8/5 (895 votes)

Submitted by: OneiricChicka
I am not currently available right now. However, if you would like to be transfered to another correspondent, please press the number that best fits your personality:
-If you are obsessive compulsive, please press "1" repeatedly.
-If you are codependant, please ask someone to press "2".
-If you have multiple personalitites, please press "3", "4", and "5".
-If you are paranoid delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace your call.
-If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and the little voice will tell you which number to press.
-If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter what number you press, no one will answer.
  • Currently 3.81/5
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3.8/5 (2929 votes)

Submitted by: DoogieMD
Shhh, I was never here...
  • Currently 3.18/5
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3.2/5 (201 votes)

Submitted by: 
My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.
  • Currently 3.82/5
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3.8/5 (1220 votes)

Submitted by: BunBun
I am spinning in my computer chair, getting all dizy. Send a message to make this mayhem stop!
  • Currently 2.56/5
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2.6/5 (81 votes)

Submitted by: SHSrunner09
Yankee Doodle went to town ridin on his mother every time he hit a bump he had another brother.
  • Currently 3.17/5
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3.2/5 (338 votes)

Submitted by: MJA22488

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