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Category: Homework
Message: A couple of days ago I sent a bunch of monkeys to go to school for me and all I got back were pages of scribbles so I have to spend a few hours doing homework. Talk to you later!
Submitted By: gigglesjus4u

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Sick Humor Away Messages

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If you think life is bad now, how would you like to be an egg? You only get laid once. You get eaten once. It takes for minutes to get hard, only to minutes to get soft. You share your box with 11 other guys, but worst of all, the only chick that ever sat on your face was your mom! So cheer up, your life isn't that bad!
  • Currently 4.26/5
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4.3/5 (3434 votes)

Submitted by: stooge
Sex is like math...- the clothes, +the bed, /the legs, ...and pray to god you don't multiply
  • Currently 3.83/5
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3.8/5 (1724 votes)

Submitted by: CrAzEd'n'DaZeD
I am not available right now because I am playing a computer game that takes up the whole screen. Oh man who am I kidding i'm looking at porn.
  • Currently 3.79/5
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3.8/5 (1370 votes)

Submitted by: weezer1602
There was a camel and an elephant talking. The elephant started to laugh and said "HA... you have boobs on your back!" the camel looked at him and said "Ya... thats really funny coming from someone with a dick on their face."
  • Currently 4.48/5
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4.5/5 (1343 votes)

Submitted by: Patty
Here's a little math for you:
Me + Your Mom - Condom = You
  • Currently 3.66/5
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3.7/5 (1287 votes)

Submitted by: asedaaa
Never trust anything that bleeds for 7 days and doesn't die!
  • Currently 3.18/5
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3.2/5 (1070 votes)

Submitted by: BSTONER56
Riddle: George Bush has a little one, Germans usailly have big ones, and priests dont use thiers ..... ..... ..... .... ....
Its a last name you dirty little boy or girl!!!
  • Currently 3.40/5
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3.4/5 (1049 votes)

Submitted by: beverageboy12
I'll be right back im watching a movie and NO, im not watching porn.
  • Currently 2.10/5
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2.1/5 (915 votes)

Submitted by: FuzzyBunnie24
Suck Suck Suck Suck.. I'm eating a lollipop you pervert.....Lata
  • Currently 3.21/5
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3.2/5 (815 votes)

Submitted by: Ghettobty747
Friends are like condoms they protect you when things get hard....And Right now Im using my friend to protect me!
  • Currently 3.53/5
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3.5/5 (695 votes)

Submitted by: Cowgirl 101
Save the trees, eat more beavers!
  • Currently 3.19/5
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3.2/5 (677 votes)

Submitted by: Tigerlillies
I'm out like Muhammad Ali in a game of Jenga!
  • Currently 2.52/5
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2.5/5 (663 votes)

Submitted by: OsitoXXI

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